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lyrics

I lie awake at night and always wonder if you like me
If I was good enough to be someone and if it might be
A possibility that I could ever write these rightly
And at the end of it, is the end of it to spite me

I walk around the halls and then I always feel familiar
Urges saying all’s lost and all these voices saying kill your-
Self because it’s over, and it’s hopeless, no one likes you,
And every mic you bought’s a waste of time, you’re being lied to

And I don’t really know if there was anyone at all
Who gave a second thought to my reality or had the gall
To take a minute of their time to notice that I’m always
Wandering the hall and in a moment I’m about to take a fall

I recall there was a time when I would notice it
If someone needed energy there was a photosynthesis
Where I would be the sunny side of someone else’s life
Nowadays I’m only trying to keep your mind off of the knife

What should I try to be?
What should I do to be okay?
Who decided who was me?
And who am I gonna be today?

What should I try to be?
What should I do to be okay?
Who decided who was me?
And who am I gonna be today?

I wish I never had this trouble when I try and go to sleep
I wish they had a pill that made me be less of a freak
I wish that every time I tried to focus on a sentence
I could say it like I meant and never stutter when I speak

I wish I could endeavor to be someone that I’m not
And instead of being clever be successful, rich, or hot
I wish that I could be whatever I decided on,
And not the product of a chromosome I have or haven’t got

I wish that I could figure out my life before I’m thirty
I wish I could give a hug to everyone that ever hurt me
I wish that I could be pristine and clean and seem serene
But every time I’m down to earth I always end up getting dirty

I wish I could be the sum of all that I’ve created
I wish that it would last, even if I end up hated
I wish that everyone I know would remember who I am
And be happy when I’m gone, even if I never made it

What should I try to be?
What should I do to be okay?
Who decided who was me?
And who am I gonna be today?

What should I try to be?
What should I do to be okay?
Who decided who was me?
And who am I gonna be today?

credits

from Turnt On One Side, track released November 6, 2015

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ForeverFreest Indianapolis, Indiana

ForeverFreest is a somewhat in-progress music...thing...out of Indianapolis. The dream here is to eventually not suck.

Pleasure to meet you all.

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